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Pursuant to the recent US Supreme Court decision led by Chief Justice Sarah Palin, the federal Bureau of Prisons, Inc. complied with the Court’s directive to relieve the “cruel and unusual” overcrowding with an initial release of the notorious Big Mama Thorndyke.
ADX Florence, CO: Only what's ABOVE ground...
While she’s been in a diabetic coma for several years, many responsible figures in corporate gov’t believe that she remains a terrorist threat to the community. more…
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“Federal Bureau of Investigation, Special Agent Steve Wakefield. How may I help you?”
“Listen, Steve, how’d you like to move outta that backwater and get an office in DC with a view of the White House?”
If there was justice...
“It’s Karl. Don’t you recognize my voice?”
“Hey! Mr. Rove. How are you? Are you here in Minneapolis?”
“No. And I won’t be. Listen, we appreciate all you’ve done for us in the past. We got some ideas that you might find interesting. It’s five more weeks to the election, and we got a few ‘October Surprises,’ for those jackanapes currently occupying the White House, if you know what I mean…” more…
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Perhaps some future alien travelers might visit Earth…
“So, what’s the verdict?”
“Oh, the usual. Pretty much what you see. A desolate planet with reeking cesspools of acidic, oily seas. The land filled with the ghostly silence of winds thru stunted, poisonous plants and crumbling buildings.
“Another species self-destructed. Probably saved the rest of us a lot of trouble.”
The senior traveler laughed, “Very poetic. But pretty cynical, aren’t we?” more…
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As I witness this world, I’ve come to feel like an alien Robinson Crusoe…marooned on this planet and damned if I can figure out how to get back home, or at least some rational alternative.
In any event, as you requested Theophilus, here’s my promised report on earthlings. I realize that this section has been quarantined, so I might be here for awhile longer…
As you know, humans are a relatively recent species, being roughly only some 200,000 years old (a minuscule fraction of our galactic year).
They’re a classic case of psycho-projected catastrophism. more…